Tag Archives: lesson

Shock #tbt

It’s been a while since I’ve written, and while I know that no apology is necessary, I almost feel as though it’s compulsory to give an excuse for my absence. I don’t yet have the words for it, but I will do my best to try. Later.

In the interim, I stumbled across a short musing I had written early last semester. It’s wordy and written in a voice that I no doubt integrated from a book I was reading at the time, but it’s true nonetheless. That was a time that I quite enjoyed writing down what was going on with me. It is probably an exercise that had kept me sane back then. I know this because the throwback was enough to make me return here, as I’ve been trying to make myself do for the past few months. Perhaps that’s an indication that God has something to do with this – plus, it’s Thursday, the official day of the week for pensive throwbacks.  Continue reading

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A Small Revelation

A little something from my journal that I felt led to share:

I need to stop being so selfish; I need to stop acting like a baby. Always thinking about my faults and my flaws and my setbacks and my demons. Jesus paid the price for me – I’m taken care of. That’s why I’m to love him first then others, then myself. For in loving God and others I love myself. Serving God and others is using the gifts God gave me in that I show grace and mercy to myself by allowing myself to take hold of the gifts from God for the sake of others.

I have flaws; a no-brainer. Self-help is not Christianity. Being a follower of Jesus means putting yourself behind you, and taking a step of faith forward towards Jesus. We are no longer enslaved to ourselves because Jesus paid the price for us. He saved us, pinned each and every sin on the cross – I am free.

The only way to claim it is to believe it. The only way to believe it is to act on it. Faith without works is dead.

Walk with Jesus. Listen to Jesus. Let the Spirit speak, shine, and love through me. That is what I have to do.

No, it’s not as easy as that. There is an enemy. But I have hope – we have the victory. All I have to do is keep standing up, in awe of the one who gave it all so that I may have life and life more abundantly. For in Him we are more than conquerors: we are children of God.

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Coming Home

My friend described my past summer as a “vision quest,” a Native American tradition of sending out the youth in pursuit of some sort of revelation. While somewhat accurate, it’s missing the key element, which is that God aspect that never seems to let me go (thank God): I went in search of myself, but I came back with a revelation of God. It’s interesting, but the more I look to myself and look for myself and try to find the meaning of my life and how I relate to people, the more depressing life becomes. Perhaps I’m alone in this, but I see the gifts I have, I see the opportunities I’ve been given, yet I cannot help but feel like a constant failure. My lack of wisdom in certain situations, the evil that I always fall back into for the sake of not having to fight against it anymore, are only a few of the many elements that I see in myself that make me hopeless. I can’t do it, and what’s worse, I can’t do it without God.
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Solomon’s Story… (to be continued)

Eccl. 2

1 I said in my heart, “Come now, I will test you with pleasure; enjoy yourself.” But behold, this also was vanity.

2 I said of laughter, “It is mad,” and of pleasure, “What use is it?” Continue reading

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NaNoWriMo – Day 4

November is important for three reasons: 1) I was born this month a couple years ago, 2) Thanksgiving, and 3) NaNoWriMo, which stands for National Novel Writing Month. This is the month in which thousands of people all over the country endeavor to do the impossible: write a novel in a month. More specifically, write 50,000 words of a novel in a month. I’ve done this personal competition for the past four years, and it just felt wrong to me to forgo the pleasure of wasting so much time over a plot that I would never actually finish.

But alas, yet again, I was dumb.    Continue reading

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Things my dad used to say [1]

“You can’t have your cake and eat it too.” He’d always tell me that when I complained that I wanted everything and got nothing. Of course, back then it’d be about how I wanted to play and instead they made me study.

Funny how some lessons never go out of style.

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When the goin’ gets tough…

… the first thought that came to my mind was, “How can I get out of this?”

Of course, it’s impossible to get out of a college essay assignment, especially if said assignment has been assigned for the past three weeks. The only notable thing about this situation is that it is the longest essay I’ve ever had to write up to this point, a whole six pages, and while I’ve been able to BS a couple essays back in the day, I’m not sure just how able I am to fill up a whole six pages with ideas about nothing pulled out from my… Continue reading

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